It's been awhile

Ok...so I haven't written in awhile....and I guess we could say things are still kind of the same for me. My life sometimes seems like a bad country song. People die, friends leave, my car still doesn't run...etc. etc. But there isn't all bad in everything. I mean I still terribly miss my best friend, whom I still am lucky enough to converse with. I miss the way things were in my life, but hope in God to make things better. Things will get better...if not in this life time, then in heaven.

On a different note....
I have noticed also that I really wish that I could be less sensitive about somethings. I hate feelings sometimes and wish I were like a strong a steady western hero, riding into the sunset instead of an over emotional "artist". But God makes us who we are for a reason, and I have begun to see somewhat of why I am who I am.

I believe that God is in control (whether we sense it or not), and everything happens for a purpose. That purpose may be to guide our next move in life, or to find a hidden fault, or to simply honor God's work. I mean look at Pharoh and how God allowed him to have all that power, just so he could demonstrate HIS own majesty by Pharoh's downfall. Teaching students gives me a lot of influence and power too...but I don't want to be like Pharoh. I have found that I can reach kids by being who I am. Kids that normally don't feel loved. I mean don't get me wrong...I am still a man...and I am not always sensitive when I should be. But I have noticed that number of students begin to increase around my room just to "hang out". Is God giving me my own outreach right there at school? I think he may...now I just hope I can be more like Moses and help "rescue" God's people from the wickedness of our social diseases.

God let me be your hands and your feet. Let me not to be afraid, but instead embrace troubled times with a servants heart. Let me serve and not be a demander. Allow me to grow in your wisdom, strength, mercy, and spirit. Keep me from falling and straying far from that path which you have chosen me to walk. Allow me to love my enemies, and neighbors as you would want me to love them. Let me produce good fruit for your harvest....Amen!